Friends

Friends are important. And I could write long posts about friends and friendship. But I am just going to post a little poem I just wrote. It’s not great, because I am certainly not a master poet. But. I post anyway. =)

 To have a friend, oh what comfort,

to you strength they lend, when you’re hurt.

Nothing needs be said, but close they stay,

to listen with bowed head, as they ever pray.

 

Never far away, ready to come at every call,

everything aside to lay, to pick you up when you fall.

These are friends, close and dear,

the brothers and sisters of Jesus, and with them never shall I fear.


Trade Yesterday … ?

Would you trade yesterday? If you could give up the day before, and reach the future. One where you have everything you could ever want, would you?

Its a thought I had. And. I decided to think it through typed out.

Perhaps I thought of this because yesterday was a pretty good day for me. Got to talk to several friends. And the conversations with all of them were simply awesome. Would I be willing to have never had those times, made those memories, formed those friendships? What am I, what are WE, willing to do to move forward in this life?

Imagine with me, if you would, what it would be like. Whatever it is you dream of doing, you’re successful with it. Best selling author. Movie director. Actor. Singer. Whatever it is. You’re it. Top of the game. Voila. But there’s just one catch. All those friends of ours. They don’t exist. Well, they do. They’re just not OUR friends. We probably never met them. Would you be okay with that? Perhaps I have a morbid mind for even thinking about this. But there are times when we need to search ourselves. Spend time in the Bible, with God, and really seek and find out just what kind of people we are.

Would we sacrifice others for our own gain? Would we cut around friends to get that deal that will set us up for our dream? What is a friend worth? What is family worth?

The past months have been a time of self-searching for me. And its been hard. And painful. But God is good, and I am starting to see the answers. I made some pretty bad mistakes last year, a few of which I am not sure can ever be remedied. For quite awhile, all I could see in myself was a complete and utter failure of a person. As a friend. As a brother. As a son. And so I had to ask myself, what do those people mean to me?

I had an answer at the very moment I asked. But I didn’t want to rush into anything. That’s how I have made so many bad choices. Hurt people. I prayed about it. Meditated on scripture. For a long time. And after quite some time I did have an answer. I COULD give up those memories, those people. Anyone COULD. But here’s the deal. God gave me my family. Those precious friends. And if given the choice to change my life through some magical thing, giving up yesterday and moving on to a bright future… I wouldn’t.

I heard a quote about teenagers and people in their early 20s. “These are the years that define you. This is the time you become who you will always be.”

Its a neat enough quote. And yes. These years do change us a lot. But we can always be redefined if we choose to be.

As rough as life is sometimes. I want to live through each moment. Because those friends come up beside me. And the bond that is formed. Well. I wouldn’t give that up for anything. It’s the STRUGGLE that defines us. The trials that make us stronger. The friendships that mold us into who we will always be.

I couldn’t ever trade yesterday.

Friends – worth the pain?

I always like being fairly descriptive with my titles about what I will be writing about.

Today’s topic, that literally arrived in my mind a few moments ago: Friends — are they worth the pain that they can sometimes cause?

I’ve seen some of my own friends say things that tells me they don’t think they really are. To some, you are only a friend if you make them feel good, you never argue, never complain, and just party out with them.

Some people are like that because they don’t want to get hurt; they just want to be loved, and not feel the pain of a broken heart and scared emotions.

Can friendship hurt bad? Oh yeah. You better believe it.

“Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”

Normally I’d give you the reference to a verse I quote, but if you really care, I want YOU to look it up. I will tell you that it is in Proverbs.

Faithful are the wounds… A true friend will, at some point, hurt you. Its inevitable. It will happen. Why would they hurt you? Tear you up inside? Because a friend, a true friend, loves you so much, that they can’t let something slide. If it really matters, they’d rather hurt you themselves and cause a gap between you, than see you go down a path that will hurt you more than they ever could.

The kisses of an enemy… Many of us have been here. That nice new kid, or whoever it is. They’re awesome, fun to be around, and make you feel great about yourself. You confide one secret, or even many in them; I mean, why not? They are the most awesome friend you have ever had! Then… they hurt you so bad by proving themselves to not have ever cared.

So, is a friend worth the pain? I’ve been hurt several times by friends. Sometimes, they don’t even mean it, but sometimes, several of which I can remember very well, it was done on purpose. Am I still friends with them? Yes. It hurt. Oh how it hurt. Oh I thought I hated them. And then it clicked. Oh my word… I was about to do that? How did I not see? Without my friend doing what they did… Who knows what might have happened?

I think that, if you hang on, if it is true friendship, that when you pull through the hurt, you’ll be closer with that person than ever before.

 

But… what if that verse does not apply? What if they simply hurt you. They didn’t do it for a reason. But they aren’t your enemy. They ARE your friend. But they hurt you.

That’s something that goes beyond my mind to grasp. But I’ve seen it happen. And it stuns me every time. But then, sometimes, you have to hurt someone; make a choice between two people asking you over at the exact same time — one of them will be hurt. That’s a simple analogy, but it works. I don’t know if I actually have enough life experience or not to be saying what I am here, but… I decided to say it anyway.

 

People. Friends will cause you pain and hurt. You may wonder if it’s worth it all. But…

As a Christian, for me, everything points to Christ. It is beyond the comprehension of most, if not all, to imagine the suffering he went through; the scourging, the cross. But he did it with the love that only very few people would do for family or friends, and He did it for his enemies.

If you live with that same love, pull the hurt, then yes, those friends are worth the pain.

 

God bless,
~Daniel